i was thinking about how one of the cult tactics come into play in such a simple action, like commenting at the meetings.
don't know if it was the same everywhere, but at our hall, sometimes the wt study conductor would call on a couple of people in sequence, the first would give thier comment, then brother "i get to carry the microphone" would run over to the other, just for them to say "he, she had my thought".
just that statement "they had my thought" says so much now.
At the hall we went to it would depend on which elder was leading the meeting...If it was Elder Underwear Too Tight...it had to be straight out of the literature.
If it was Elder Pompadour - He woud sigh loudly into the microphone and say " Does anyone have any comment not directly from the literature?"
There would actually be long periods of silence afterwards at times....
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
i've written about this many times here.
my jehovahs witness mother in law has decided that she wants to be a part of our life again (this week).
we have basically disfellowshipped her from our lives because she refuses to follow our rules.
Hubert -
We talk to each other when we have to, and are pleasant with each other, but there is always a friction, and a sense of untrust between us,
You described how it is with my mother in law and me as if you were an observer on the wall...its like there is a feeling like everything could hit the fan at any second...because I never know what she will say and I never know if I am going to have the control not to strangle her....LOL - Really I'm not a violent person!
I am really just trying to do what is best for the boys. If she can be nice and not abusive and follow our rules. She is welcome to be around the children as long as it is supervised.
Mrs. Jones -
I'm sorry your Mom blames your husband. It's like these women don't think there children are smart enough to make their own decisions about their own lives. But if my husband and you stayed JW's - You can bet these Mom's would be saying how smart their children are!
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
this is such a huge issue for me.
i don't want anyone to tell me what to do or how to live.
in part this is due to the control that the wts and the elders had over my life.
Hi Lady Lee,
Although I am not - nor have I ever been a JW...I do have control issues. I think it comes form having a alcoholic/drug abusing biological father the first 5 years of my life. Everything was so out of control. Then it doesn't help that my mother is a control freak although she's letting up as I get older and she realizes she cannot control me or my choices. She attempts to manipulate at times, but I just say gotta go...the kids need me. Don't get me wrong, I love my mom and she is pretty wonderful...but she has her issues too. LOL!
Some people may laugh at this...I don't care. I go to Al-Anon and ACOA meetings (Adult Children of Alcoholics). It has helped me a lot.
Here is something that I was reading today ...
Today's Reminder-
Right now, today, I will lighten my burden by dropping that part of it which does not belong to me. Today I will look more closely at my thoughts and impulses, and take only such action as is required of me.
"Keep thyself first in peace and then though wilt be able to bring others to peace. Have, therefore, a zeal in the first place over thyself..."
(Thomas A' Kempis)
And lastly, I have 2 children...I mention this all the time on the forum because they are my life and love...But having children makes you see all your flaws and teaches you so many life lessons. I learned that I am also a bit of a control freak. With the birth of #2 most wonderful boy in the world I needed and have learned to take it easy and not be such a micro manager...to slow down and have fun and do only what needs to be done at times. It doesn't matter so much if there is not the most fabulous meal on the table every night, or if the kids look perfect every second...It's more important that we are all okay and having fun being together.
I don't know if anything I wrote makes sense to anyone other than me...
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
i've been playing this on another forum and its loads of fun so thought you guys might enjoy it too... a person asks a question, any question at all, and the poster below answers it, any way they like.
then they ask a question of their own.. i'll start, .
why do you crave junk food when you have a hangover?
I haven't had a hangover in a really long time - probably not since hubby and I were first together, before the 2 kidlings came....but I always crave tylenol and sleep and that nothing I did the night before ended up on the tv or in the newspaper!
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
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jump up and down (to get your attention) and ask you what you think of my new avatar.. no one noticed .
i swear i feel like a ghost sometimes on this board.. *going to a corner to sulk*
That is one cutie pie! Kids are the best!
Don't feel badly..no one commented on my avatar either...I've officially come out of hiding...Thats me and #2 son.
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
do you every worry about dying?
do you think that you probably won't have a very long life?
I'm more afraid of dying a horrilbly violent painful death...I was a paramedic and I know every bad thing that can happen.I don't worry about what happens afterwards - heaven, hell, purgatory, nothing...
I worry about leaving my sons alone in the world and not seeing them grow into the wonderful men I know they are going to be.
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
i've written about this many times here.
my jehovahs witness mother in law has decided that she wants to be a part of our life again (this week).
we have basically disfellowshipped her from our lives because she refuses to follow our rules.
One more thing....
I was talking to a friend who was also raised as a JW and has a whole JW family. She said that MIL probably holds me responsible for Darling Husband leaving the truth which is why she treats me poorly. And that she doesn't want to accept Hubby is an adult and can make his own decisions - that its easier to blame me instead of him.
What do you think?
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
i've written about this many times here.
my jehovahs witness mother in law has decided that she wants to be a part of our life again (this week).
we have basically disfellowshipped her from our lives because she refuses to follow our rules.
Update So MIL called Darling Husband and offered him the snowblower back since he bought it and it cost a lot of money...he wanted it because our backyard is basically a parking lot...and its a lot of shovelling!!! So he decides he's going to go get in on Monday night...and asks #1 Son if he wants to go with him. This pissed me off because I don't want the kids around her ( But I did knew it was coming...because this is a recurrent subject at our house) and because he didn't discuss any of this with me first....#1 Son wants to go because he loves the toy closet at MIL's House and he wants to see Darling Husbands sister who lives with MIL. I say no - have a nice time.... But #1 Son goes into a full tantrum when I say he can't go....and then Darling Husband says do you want to look like the badguy who won't let him see his Grammy? So I say fine and realize I have to go because he will be outside putting the snowblower in the truck and she's not going to be alone with my son...and immediately my stomach starts hurting and I feel all pukey. So we go over...MIL doesn't say anything to me. She does talk to #1 Son and comments on how big #1 & #2 sons have gotten. She tries to hold #2 Son and he screams and tries to get to Mommy. #1 Son says he doesn't know who you are Grammy...you're a stranger. Then #1 Son was talking about Christmas and going to see Santa and she was looking upset and like she wanted to say something because she opened and closed her mouth a few times like she wanted to talk...I could see it on her face!! I put a stop to that with the Evil Eye look that I have perfected. #1 Son goes on to tell her all about his Veggie Tales Easter and Christmas Video's and all about the Bible...and about how he goes to a Christian School, chapel, music class and plays Soccer. All things she didn't know. ( I hope she feels badly because she's missing out on his wonderfullness). Husbands sister came home and played with the boys...She has never seen #2 son and she asked if she could come over and see the boys. I told her you are always welcome...but I don't put much faith in it since she's been saying that since we moved into our house 3.5 years ago and has never managed to drive the 9 miles! As we were leaving MIL said goodbye..usually she gives #1 Son a hug. But she just shut the door. Husbands sister gave the boys hugs and was ultra friendly. Darling Husband said...See everything is okay she was great. I just said you don't know know how hard that was because you were outside...and he said everything seemed okay. You all were talking to eachother...I said we were talking to the children - not to eachother. It's very hard to be around someone who you know doesn't like you, has lied about you, and treated you badly on more than one occasion. I told him....You are so oblivious.... I love Darling Husband and that he has hope that everything will be good with his family...but after 8 years I am just tired of her. Only her feelings matter, it doesn't matter how she treats other people...she's the victim and the one being persecuted. She's so broken she can't even being truly loving to our kids or to Darling Husband. I wish she could see how her behavior effects other people. Don't get me wrong..I know I have my issues too - I am definately not perfect .... I have 2 sons and I don't think for a minute that I am going to be completely happy with whoever they choose to spend their lives with or all their decisions....but I don't ever want to loose my boys so I will shut my mouth and smile.. especially when and if Grandkids are involved... It will probably be another 6 months at least before we see her again. And I didn't do anything or say anything that I will be ashamed about later or cause problems....but I never really know - anything or nothing can set her off. Chrystal aka Why Georgia
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i always remember jws making a special effort to go out on fs on christmas day...and near me they still do....what will you say to them if they should knock on your door?.
db74
When we lived in California we had the JW's come to our house on Thanksgiving and on Christmas Day. Our house was one block from the KH and they came by our house every 6 weeks. My mother would get so mad and yell at them...this was long before I ever met my husband got married into a big JW family! LOL!
If they came by our house on Christmas....it would probably be some of hubby's family and depending on who it was I might invite them in and give them cookies and fudge.
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
hundreds of gay couples are preparing to form civil partnerships in the coming weeks as the law changes after decades of campaigning.
at least 1,200 ceremonies are confirmed as being scheduled already and registrars are preparing for the first ceremonies, with couples permitted to register from monday morning.
so how do you feel about it?
Its been legal here in Massachusetts for a while. My town is the only town in Massachusetts that will marry out of state same sex couples. There is a law on our books that an out of state person may not get married within the Commonwealth. Our mayor - who is also Gay doesn't feel that rule is applicable and instructs the town clerk not to follow the law.
I personally don't care about the adults...I care about the children that come from these unions that they will be protected and afforded the rights they deserve...the same rights given to children of a man/woman couple.
Chrystal aka Why Georgia
